It’s a Practice: We all Need Support to Break the Cycles!

I have been quiet lately.  I could hide and say “we took a break for the back half of July.”  That’s not untrue, but it’s also not completely true.  

I’ve been a bit stuck myself.  That’s the truth.The stuck-ness was disguised as being “on a break” as well as not being able to decide whether I should be writing a blog post on our website or on Substack.  But that’s not the real “stuck”There’s an identifiable pattern of putting all the things for all the people in front of what I need and want.  Writing, for me, is healing.  Sharing my words is a challenge to myself to stay vulnerable and reach for support.  It is a must in my life and I haven’t been doing it.In the month of July, I was mired in “stuff and things” that were “important” for my family.  That’s true.  These were important things with a capital “I.”  I was not making that up.  And true to my patterns, because they were “Important” things, I was back to bulldozing and white-knuckling the outcome. 

I’ve written two books over the last three years discussing the practice of identifying these particular patterns and breaking those cycles.

And yet . . .

We were in such a high-stakes situation that lasted so many days, that I found myself, well, stuck in the comfort of that unhealthy pattern. So my silence has nothing to do with blog posts vs. Substack, because that’s not real.  I can, of course, post on both! My silence was born out of being stuck in a place that I know is not healthy for me.I am happy to report that the pattern has been recognized and the cycle broken once again with the support of my husband, my friends and yes, my coach.  

This cycle breaking is a practice friends.  And we ALL need support.  There is no prize for martyrdom.  For me support has looked like:

1. Accountability for getting to the yoga studio (my good dog won’t let me skip walks!)

2. Debunking my Substack/Blog post dilemma with my coach and identifying what’s behind that story I was telling myself

3. A reclaiming of my writing time on the family calendar for all to see and support.

4. Writing this post!

So I invite you to share.  

Where have you found yourself stuck, again?  What unhealthy patterns show up as “comfort”What support do you reach for to break those cycles?XOXOCindy